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Glorified Top Trumps - A rant by Phiblo This is a very personal rant I'm afraid. There are some things that probably get on most people's nerves, but then there are little irrational hates that people have. For instance, Mr Toby Goldstein of 28 Milborough Avenue, Brighton, has an irrational hatred of his address being put on the interweb. Anyway, where was I? Ah yes, my irrational hatred. I HATE MANGA AND ANIME! In fact Japanese animation of any kind really gets on my nerves. Firstly you've got the stuff that is basically cartoon porn, as shown here. Can anyone explain to me the point of this? Would you not feel just a little strange shaking hands with your beef over a picture like this? I can't see that it serves any other purpose than this. Please tell me it's not just me! Right next up you've got the mystical stuff. Fair enough, they're telling a story and it's usually just a moralistic good vs evil thing. I can just about stomach this. But it's the third and final type that annoys me the most. The third type is the sort that spawned such tripe as Pokémon and other drab cartoons. The idea appears to be quite simple, it's people playing top trumps to win battles with their enemies. George W Bush should take note, it's a peaceful solution that doesn't involve bombing and killing innocent civilians. But just when you think you've got the hang of it, the follow exchange happens: Player 1 - My card Luxorator (or insert daft name here) beats your card with 11 attack points Player 2 - Aha, but I've got the Whirlwind card, which means that I win because you can't beat me. Player 1 - What? Player 2 - I've got the Whirlwind card, which means that I win because you can't beat me. Player 1 - You're making this up! Fine, two can play at that game. I've got the mystical teapot dragon card though, and he eats whirlwinds for breakfast. Player 2 - Oh no, you're right. You would win then, if I didn't have the orange yoghurt master... So you get the basic idea. It's a cartoon about two people playing glorified top trumps but they can make up rules as they go along. What is the point in that? Anyway, to show I'm not bitter, I've made my own version of an Anime card game involving twistedmindz things. Print out the cards below, you only need two cards, although you can make more if you want to. Shuffle the cards and deal them, you should now have one card each (this is only a 2 player game). Now take it in turns to come up with a reason why the other person should not win. The first person to run out of ideas loses!
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